Tonight on my run (logged about 5 miles tonight) I remembered how hard it use to be. It wasnt ever easy in the beginning. I thought it was but it wasnt. It was hard and then it was HARDER. The cool thing i have learned with the "starting over" concept is that we all are always starting over. But everytime we start over it DOES get easier and easier. It like this big circular escalator.
It goes like this:
step 1: you want to workout and eat right because you feel fat and lazy and are determined to change. You pull yourself up by your bootstraps and no matter how difficult it is, no matter how hard... you START.
step 2: you keep going despite how hard it is. despite how many people will run past you on the trail and despite how badly you want a donut and a coke. You keep going... but its HARD and you wonder if it will always be hard.
Step 3: you get a few days or weeks or months under your belt. your feeling GREAT about your progress.... you think FINALLY.. i am in a HABIT of exercise and eating healthy. FINALLY its not so hard.
step 4: you think your goals are so close that it wont be anytime until you reach them.Your so proud of your progress but secretely, deep down .. you wonder if it will last.
step 5: LIFE HAPPENS. kids get sick, the washer breaks, you get sick, you get injured.... the demands of life take over and you miss a workout... then a week goes by... then a month.... then 2 months.... and you get depressed. You think your a failure. You think you wasted so much time. You think its all just too hard.
then.
you settle
after a while... you realize... settling means death.
Death of your spirit, your dreams, your energy, your life as you know it can be. You make a choice...........Is it the hard work of Life... or do you let your dreams die?
You step back the escalator and start OVER!
the next time you start over.... its the same pattern... but every time LIFE HAPPENS and you stop.. every time you begin again... it gets easier. Everytime.... the space between starting and stopping and starting again becomes closer and closer..... until you find yourself 4 years later stopping and starting again within 3 days of each other. You realize the habit of fitness and health are a part of your life and always will be.
In the beginning.... its HARD... it seems like it will be hard forerver.... but it wont.
thought I would some posts I wrote from 2006......over 1500 posts ago!
FROM NOV 2006
UGH.. today and yesterday I have had the "I dont want to excersise" blues. I knew I should have ran yesterday but I wanted to wait until today. NOW its cold, cloudy, and the day just has that "sit on my bottom all day" kinda day. Its so interesting to me that I still struggle with getting up and getting my excersise in. I would have thought that after sooooo many days it would be easy. But its NOT. I guess it never will be.
Life just gets so busy, the house gets so messy, and everything needs to be done. Everything else is demanding my attetion.. and it seems like I just want to sit and ignore it! Sitting and ignoring it gets nothing done. The funny thing is.. the longer I go "dreading" my run.. the more stressed out I am becoming.
I have a list of "I wants" going through my head...
(do you ever do this?).. these are things I want to be doing instead of what I need to be doing OR things I wish would just magically get done:
I want to sit at my new drawing table/art area and work on artwork (from now until 2 am would be great!).
I want to sit and watch TV.
I want to take a nap.
I want to have the laundry all clean, folded and put away.
I want the last three boxes I need to go through to be empty.
I want to call my DSnL and talk for 2 hours.
I want to go take a hot bath .. so I will be warm from head to toe.
I want to drink some more sweet tea and eat a bag of popcorn.
I want ....
well.. those are all the wants for now.. I know there are more.. but for now.. that will have to do.
You know I started this post today to talk myself into getting up and getting my run finished.. funny thing.. it worked.
I still dont WANT to do it.. but I am going to make myself. I will feel better if I do.
So.. here I go.. off to get my exercise in inspite of all the "I wants"
I will post when I am done.. how I did.
UPDATE!
Well. I wonder if any more of my "wants" will come true? As I was typing DSnL called! wow..it was nice to at least get ONE want on my list! .. I dedicate my workout tonight to A! .. I told you on the phone I was gona do it.. and that made me! Plus you saying "now.. are you going to let day 147 be the day you MISS a workout?" .. answer.. NO :) (thanks for the kick I needed to get in there!)
It is now 6:36pm.. I am happy to say I JUST finished my workout!
I did HIIT cardio 1.64 miles
one warmup "hiit" at 7.4 and then SIX HIITs at 10!~.. Now I remembered when I was running that this week was "just ONE more" ... so.. I did my planned FIVE and then said.. OK>> now just ONE more for Josha! .. (thanks J.. now i am completely exhausted!)
ABS: I did 151 incline twists (notice the "just one more?" and then I did 51 hip raises (again.. The ONE more is for Josha!)
I must say at this point.. exercise is a MUST for me now.. I am completely de-stressed and getting more and more energy as I sit here and type! Exercise for me is now much more than getting up and getting moving.. Its about stress relief, feeling good about myself, not letting myself down, reaching my goal, and hopefully inspiring a few others along the way. Its not always easy. But I am not ready to give up the body I have worked so hard for. I would like to keep it for a while thank you very much.. and I know in order to do that .. working out is a MUST!
Yet again.. Blogging got me through my "i dont want to exercise blues!" Yipee!
Life just gets so busy, the house gets so messy, and everything needs to be done. Everything else is demanding my attetion.. and it seems like I just want to sit and ignore it! Sitting and ignoring it gets nothing done. The funny thing is.. the longer I go "dreading" my run.. the more stressed out I am becoming.
I have a list of "I wants" going through my head...
(do you ever do this?).. these are things I want to be doing instead of what I need to be doing OR things I wish would just magically get done:
I want to sit at my new drawing table/art area and work on artwork (from now until 2 am would be great!).
I want to sit and watch TV.
I want to take a nap.
I want to have the laundry all clean, folded and put away.
I want the last three boxes I need to go through to be empty.
I want to call my DSnL and talk for 2 hours.
I want to go take a hot bath .. so I will be warm from head to toe.
I want to drink some more sweet tea and eat a bag of popcorn.
I want ....
well.. those are all the wants for now.. I know there are more.. but for now.. that will have to do.
You know I started this post today to talk myself into getting up and getting my run finished.. funny thing.. it worked.
I still dont WANT to do it.. but I am going to make myself. I will feel better if I do.
So.. here I go.. off to get my exercise in inspite of all the "I wants"
I will post when I am done.. how I did.
UPDATE!
Well. I wonder if any more of my "wants" will come true? As I was typing DSnL called! wow..it was nice to at least get ONE want on my list! .. I dedicate my workout tonight to A! .. I told you on the phone I was gona do it.. and that made me! Plus you saying "now.. are you going to let day 147 be the day you MISS a workout?" .. answer.. NO :) (thanks for the kick I needed to get in there!)
It is now 6:36pm.. I am happy to say I JUST finished my workout!
I did HIIT cardio 1.64 miles
one warmup "hiit" at 7.4 and then SIX HIITs at 10!~.. Now I remembered when I was running that this week was "just ONE more" ... so.. I did my planned FIVE and then said.. OK>> now just ONE more for Josha! .. (thanks J.. now i am completely exhausted!)
ABS: I did 151 incline twists (notice the "just one more?" and then I did 51 hip raises (again.. The ONE more is for Josha!)
I must say at this point.. exercise is a MUST for me now.. I am completely de-stressed and getting more and more energy as I sit here and type! Exercise for me is now much more than getting up and getting moving.. Its about stress relief, feeling good about myself, not letting myself down, reaching my goal, and hopefully inspiring a few others along the way. Its not always easy. But I am not ready to give up the body I have worked so hard for. I would like to keep it for a while thank you very much.. and I know in order to do that .. working out is a MUST!
Yet again.. Blogging got me through my "i dont want to exercise blues!" Yipee!
-------------- ANOTHER FROM 06---------------
I would have never thought that on day 65 I would have the hardest time in the world getting on that treadmill..to think 65 days of not missing a workout.. it has become such a habit .. and today.. on day 65 I came very very close to just not doing it.. BUT I DID!..
Life has been a bit crazy around here.. I finished the bowling alley last night.. after 8 hours of painting! .. I woke up this morning with a sore back.. my left side.. I guess from all that painting.. who knows.. all i know is that I stayed in bed until 915.. which is like NOON to most people! .. but after not getting to sleep until almost 1am.. I needed the rest.. BUT that threw my schedule off and I just felt aweful this morning..
It took a good mile of walking on the treadmill to wake up and feel better.. I then ran my interval training .. and of course thirty minutes later I feel sooooooooo much better.!..
So heres to struggling through day 65s workout and not quitting!
Mark Twain: Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.
(I definately had to coax myself today! :)
Life has been a bit crazy around here.. I finished the bowling alley last night.. after 8 hours of painting! .. I woke up this morning with a sore back.. my left side.. I guess from all that painting.. who knows.. all i know is that I stayed in bed until 915.. which is like NOON to most people! .. but after not getting to sleep until almost 1am.. I needed the rest.. BUT that threw my schedule off and I just felt aweful this morning..
It took a good mile of walking on the treadmill to wake up and feel better.. I then ran my interval training .. and of course thirty minutes later I feel sooooooooo much better.!..
So heres to struggling through day 65s workout and not quitting!
Mark Twain: Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.
(I definately had to coax myself today! :)
----------------AND ANOTHER---------
"I believe what you perceive as your best effort is a self-imposed limitation. I believe you are capable of much more than you realize" ___Bill Phillips (body for life)
Ok.. so most of my life as a child/teen was filled with sports, softball mostly, and music (band, clarinet).. both of those areas I excelled in.. I reached some amazing goals that I thought were not possible... I often ask myself why.. what was so special about me? Well.. I realize now that it wasnt ME.. ( I mean it was me but not all me).. I had coaches, men who loved the sport, or the music, and taught me how to improve. These coaches pushed me when I thought was good enough.. sometimes thinking I was the best I could be.. they would push me to be even better... and to my surprise.. I reached higher and higher goals. ..I also had my own little built in cheering section.. in the form of Mom and Dad and my siblings.. who always said positive things when it came to those two areas I chose to participate in...
Ok.. all well and good.. but what does that have to do with this blog? with today?
Well..through those people.. I learned that I could go much farther and be much better than I thought.. I had put self-imposed limitations on myself. It took a coach to say "OH>. no.. no way.. you can do better than that!" .... Or for them to say " Thats all you got? you are not leaving this field until you get it right three time staight.. ".. /// So.. here is the problem.. After almost 20 years of not having a coach (I stopped playing ball and clarinet around 18).. I have finally figured out why I have such a issue with completing this program..... I have to be my own coach.. and with the exception of a few people in my life.. my own cheering section too.. ! (oh great!)..
Some things that help keep me on track are:
staying focused on not missing a workout.. and NOT cheating my body with bad food.. (I dont want to mess up all that hard work I did in the garage with eating low nutrient foods.. )
I try and stay motivated by listening to the body for life on cd... (this is where I got the quote about self limitations.. really spoke to me today for some reason)...
I try and not worry .. and let others comments just role of me.. I have goals.. we all do.. but mine dont include the chips and hot sauce, the coke or the cake and ice creams theirs do :) thats fine!... they can eat theirs now I will have mine on my free day!
and I Try to blog everyday.. keeping track.. and actually typing the day .. that keeps me going.. (cant wait to type the words.. Day 84... program completed!")..
So.. heres to today.. to not limiting myself ...
----------
todays workout..
Lower body...
leg extensions, leg curls, burn outs with lunges.. (yes.. the "i fell like I just got butt implant" lunges)
also did ab work..
Food wise went well today.. one day soon i will post some recipes/shakes I LOVE!
----------
Peace and Progress.....
Ok.. so most of my life as a child/teen was filled with sports, softball mostly, and music (band, clarinet).. both of those areas I excelled in.. I reached some amazing goals that I thought were not possible... I often ask myself why.. what was so special about me? Well.. I realize now that it wasnt ME.. ( I mean it was me but not all me).. I had coaches, men who loved the sport, or the music, and taught me how to improve. These coaches pushed me when I thought was good enough.. sometimes thinking I was the best I could be.. they would push me to be even better... and to my surprise.. I reached higher and higher goals. ..I also had my own little built in cheering section.. in the form of Mom and Dad and my siblings.. who always said positive things when it came to those two areas I chose to participate in...
Ok.. all well and good.. but what does that have to do with this blog? with today?
Well..through those people.. I learned that I could go much farther and be much better than I thought.. I had put self-imposed limitations on myself. It took a coach to say "OH>. no.. no way.. you can do better than that!" .... Or for them to say " Thats all you got? you are not leaving this field until you get it right three time staight.. ".. /// So.. here is the problem.. After almost 20 years of not having a coach (I stopped playing ball and clarinet around 18).. I have finally figured out why I have such a issue with completing this program..... I have to be my own coach.. and with the exception of a few people in my life.. my own cheering section too.. ! (oh great!)..
Some things that help keep me on track are:
staying focused on not missing a workout.. and NOT cheating my body with bad food.. (I dont want to mess up all that hard work I did in the garage with eating low nutrient foods.. )
I try and stay motivated by listening to the body for life on cd... (this is where I got the quote about self limitations.. really spoke to me today for some reason)...
I try and not worry .. and let others comments just role of me.. I have goals.. we all do.. but mine dont include the chips and hot sauce, the coke or the cake and ice creams theirs do :) thats fine!... they can eat theirs now I will have mine on my free day!
and I Try to blog everyday.. keeping track.. and actually typing the day .. that keeps me going.. (cant wait to type the words.. Day 84... program completed!")..
So.. heres to today.. to not limiting myself ...
----------
todays workout..
Lower body...
leg extensions, leg curls, burn outs with lunges.. (yes.. the "i fell like I just got butt implant" lunges)
also did ab work..
Food wise went well today.. one day soon i will post some recipes/shakes I LOVE!
----------
Peace and Progress.....
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