The BIG 40!

Jan 9th 2006:

The act of making something different

"Modification:
The act of making something different, or in my case, "someone" different. (ME)

I have created this blog site to motivate myself, yes.. this is mostly selfish of me ( I figure if a few friends and family see my before pictures and are aware of my journey I will be more motivated to stick with it..I have my reasons for this which I will get into on a later post).
But I do hope in some way I can help inspire others to change as well. I will post my before, "in progress" and after pics here as well. I will share with you my goals for weight loss/management, increasing my stregth and energy levels. My goal is to be open and honest about the challenges of becoming fit and healthy.

My Body Modification Blog is going to be more than just about changing my body. It will be about changing my life in more ways than one. I hope you will jump on your own Bod Mod journey with me ... If I can change, anyone can!"



________

Here I am. I set a goal of being fantastically fit by 40 over 2 years ago. Back then it seemed like my birthday was soooooo far away. But in the blink of an eye here I am. I have always heard it said .. "loosing weight is hard .. but keeping the weight off is even harder". So today i am here to Celebrate. My life, and my journey.

All of you who read my blog know that I try very hard to be real and honest when it comes to all this "getting in shape" stuff. Today is no different.

All this time.. over the last 2 years I envisioned myself on my 40th birthday. I dreamed I would be so amazingly fit. 50 pushups, running miles upon miles, lean "cut" arms and legs, and the glorious ABS showing :) I had envisioned myself walking around in a comfortable size 4 and wondered if were possible for the size 2 to enter my closet by now. I believed by this point i would have conquered my food demons and have fitness be such a habit it was like brushin my teeth everynight and morning.. :)

But as you have read from my previous posts. My foot has side tracked me, and .. to be honest throw me for a big loop and taken the winds out of my sails.

Goals are set and reset. Some were reached and some had to be stratched. I can no longer do pushups because of my shoulder injury, I can not run miles and mile because of my foot, I am NOT in a size 4 and no longer believe size 2 is a reasonable idea to have of myself(no amount of working out will fix the baby belly i am bless with, short of a surgical intervention.. size to 4 or 2 is probably a no go). I have NOT conquered my food demons altogether and fitness is still a struggle some days.

Life is not always what we dream. Life throws us curves, and knocks us down. And what I have learned over the last 2 years. and Esp the last 2 and half weeks is that
its not about the goal.. its about the journey. I have to be happy with where i am today because i HAVE worked hard. I HAVE changed my life in many ways. I no longer dream of big bowls of blue bell and cant wait for the next episode of (whatever tv show) to come on. The headaches, foot pains, back pains, stomach pains, and everything else is pretty close to being gone. A normal day for me back then included all these ....... today i can say... I feel GREAT the majority of the time.

So.
Here i am .. in all my 40 year old self's glory. Feeling a bit knocked down.. but realizing that I am NOT a quitter. I am NOT going to give up and i will continue to fight to be fit and active.
I WILL be at the starting line on Nov 16th and i WILL conquer my fears and doubts and complete 26.2 of pure emotional and physical gut wrenching miles.


This day is not what i dreamed it would be...... but its better than I deserve it to be :)





(If you are wondering: i do plan on doing a celebration video of my journey but i am putting it off until i finish the marathon :)

OH by they way.. I walked-jogged a mile this morning with the kids and ran sprints. :)