have you lifted yet??

Me neither.. but I am fixing too.. will post afterward :)

5:36pm.. approx 20 min later:
ok. I am done.. YIPEE! Upper body for me today.. chest, shoulders and tris.. I alternated between 12 and 15 reps and repeated each set 3 times with a burnout on each part... my arms are jello!!!

I said I would start posting my eats.. so here they are so far.. just a two meal bobble.. :)
Meal 1: french toast with butter and syrup. (why didnt I make mine the healthy version? lazy I guess.. so this had butter and syrup)
Meal 2: frozen pizza and chips, tea (now THATS healthy)
Meal 3: open faced peanut butter crackers with tea
Meal 4: taco stew (which i am fixing to make)
Meal 5 protein shake

I am at that point where I am frustrated with myself as far as eats go.. I am also frustrated with .. you guessed it.. my tummy. I said I would never talk about it again.. but the few lbs I have gained this last week from eating poorly have all ended up on my tummy.. which drives me crazy as that little layer hangs over my pants when I sit down.. and ... well. I am officially tired of it.. I dont know if my tummy will ever be what it use to be .. but I am tired of it being like it is.. short of a tummy tuck.. which I would NEVER do... I am stuck with it.... .. but cant it be a bit smaller? I am not asking for a size 2 or anything.. I am just asking for a few inches off ..

I guess it is natural to have a pendulme swinging back and forth.. where "oh I feel great!" to "I slipped.. will this ever be a non-issue?" Sometimes I just get tired of thinking about food and my eats.. .. sometimes I wish I could just eat whatever I want and not worry about it.. but.. i guess its part of life.. if I want to feel good.. I HAVE to eat right.. I must!

but its ok to get frustrated isnt it? Its ok to get tired of it right? After a year and a half.. isnt it ok for it to get old? I think its all natural.. as I grew up eating any kind of junk and playing hard and just didnt have much of a problem.. but truth be told.. I never felt great about myself.

In a way I feel like I have, over the last 18 months conquered the workout problem in my life.. now I guess my focus for the next 18 months will be conquering the eating healthy and feeling ok about it all the time part of this ... .. .. I am thinking this part of "getting healthy" will be a bit more difficult for me. I have done this for several weeks and months at a time.. but never for a long extended period of time.. and never for a year. ... could it be possible? a year?

So.. I have decided for the next few weeks/months I will post my workouts but I will start focusing more and more on eats and the trials and tribulations I know I will be having with them.

so.. i started with a bobble this morning but hope the rest of the week to be focused and strong .. I am ready... really ready to make yet another transformation.. I am ready to conquer healthy eating ... :)

I will be listing goals/ideas/problems/ over the next few days.. I need to focus on where I am .. and plan so I can get where I am going.. ..

thanks for listening
ruthie